When marimba rythm starts to play, dance with me...

sway with me...

No matter where and when I hear this song, whoever is singing it and what the situation, it always makes me want to get up and dance. Not only does it have a rythm that makes my hips just want to GO and my feet glide, but it describes basically the perfect moment. Picture this: the lights come up, you spot someone from across the room and in that moment you make your way to them They make their way to you. It doesn't really make a difference, all that really matters is that in that moment you move in unison because that is what is supposed to happen. That is what the music is making you both do and you are so in sync with that other person that everything else falls away. The perfect moment. What happens beyond that doesn't matter. I don't care if after the song ends you two part ways and never speak again. I don't care if you fall in love and live happily ever after. I don't care if you become best friends or worst enemies. All that matters is that for about three minutes you had a breathtakingly exhilarating experience. Too often people let the circumstances of a situation--what happens before it or after it--taint the actual experience. People worry about what this or that action of theirs means to others. What will my friends think if I (insert action here)? What will he/she do if I (insert)? Too often we get caught up in the extra stuff that we can't enjoy the moments that are there to take our breath away, even if they only last for 3 minutes and only come every once in a while. If you can truly let go of trying to tailor your actions and decisions to the desires of others and focus on finding your own marimba rythm, then you can make those moments more often because more often you will do what you want without regard for what society feels is "proper conduct" from you. So what if you come off quirky. So what if your friends know you as the weird one? If you're the normal one I'd be more worried. It means you're boring.

Challenge:
I want everyone I know this week to go do something out of his or her comfort zone that they have wanted to do for a while. Go salsa dancing, go sing karaoke, go put on a pair of skates and let lose like a little kid, cook something. I don't really care what it is and it doesn't have to be big. Just different. Break out of the ordinary norms of what you do because you know it is acceptable and your friends expect it of you. Do something that will cause people to say "Really? (insert YOUR name) did THAT this past weekend? I had no idea!" Make them see you differently and do something that inspires others to leave their comfort zones and try to find moments of perfection in new places. I don't care if you ever do it again. At the very worst, you know you defo don't want to try that again. At the best, you finds something you love that will bring you joy for years. You will at least have one moment of pure life in the knowledge that you are doing something brand new to you. After all...aren't we all trying to make the world a little more of an interesting place?

Just my thoughts
Radhi

A new leaf....again....

And we are back. Thanksgiving break was nice and rejuvenating and now its finals time. I am getting my nerd on so hardcore it isn't even funny. I'm married to these books for the next couple of weeks which is nice because I've started with enough time so that I'm not cramming and I can take a couple nights off to relax and sleep and whatnot. It is going to be a very healthy study period :)

I have also decided to turn a new leaf. Again. Hahahaha I know it is getting old but the new thing (this goes in hand in hand with my whole live every second to its fullest potential thing) is to do things that are good for me. I am going to try my hardest to do things that make me those around me happy, make me happy, and are GOOD for me. What makes you smile? Do it. What makes your heart race (in the good way)? Do it. That is what I will be doing. Especially after finals are over and I have a whole month of nothing to do. I am going to have some serious me time. What is right for you? Do it. I like this plan. I'll keep you posted. Now if you will all excuse me, I have a date (with finance) :)

Radhi

The most crash ever.

I don't know what to think right now. I'm not even sure if I AM capable of thought right now. Sorry if this post is completely incoherent and I come back and try to look at what I've posted tomorrow and realize I'm a crazy person and then delete it. This may just be word vomit.

CORE business plan? check. That motherfucker has been turned in (and when I was signing the cover page with my teammates, I felt like I should have been doing so in blood). Nonetheless, it is done. All that remains between me and a winter break of funsies is now giving a presentation on the business plan....and finals. But on the bright side? I'll be completely done in about two weeks. CORE will be behind me and the sun will shine brighter, the birds chirp sweeter and yada yada yada.

So what has CORE been like? What was this past week of hell (hell week, if you will) like?
One big long sleepless mindfuck. And just when you think you were doing well and you can escape the insanity? It comes back to punch you straight in the face. And then laugh at you. So my team did a pretty great job all semester but, like most teams, we had to live together to get the plan done in time for the last week. Which was fine--its part of the CORE experience. Didn't mind it...had some fun with them while we were at it. But what I DO mind is on the last day before the plan is due, the day we had planned to do NOTHING because we were done and I had edited ALL 65 PAGES OF THE PLAN MULTIPLE TIMES, one teammate decides it would be ok to open the document, read it, make change it, and then decide she wasn't comfortable turning it in yet. Not ok. SO not ok, I don't even have strong enough words for it. So there we are, waiting. waiting. waiting. for her to figure out what she wants to edit. She brings the plan to me and says: this is what I don't like. She points out a few TRIVIAL things. And then hands it to me. I look at her blankfaced and then I realize she doesn't know what she wants to change these parts to, but I am damn sure she expects me to do it. At this point? I left. I went home, showered, packed for break, and went back. I fixed the minor edits as well as correcting all the dumb edits she had screwed up. Basically, we got it in on time. We turned in a business plan I am proud of, but the level of stress and anger that I experienced last night is unlike anything I have ever felt before in my life. How can one person make an entire ten person's life a living hell? I dunno, ask her. Because we all wanted to kill her last night. YOU DON"T FUCK WITH THINGS LIKE THAT WHEN IT AFFECTS OTHER PEOPLE"S GRADES. I don't give a shit if you don't care about your own grade. Hand in the project late. That's al you. But I will be DAMNED if you think I spent a day and a half editing a document to make it flow eloquently and then I don't plan on handing it in on time so we get a kickass grade.

Fuck. You.
Wow...so that came off a little more angry than I had expected it to. But hey....I'm on a plane home right now, as Allen said, "I have reached the summit of Everest and have now only the trek down," and it's thanksgiving.

So I guess we'll end with what I'm thankful for:
8 teammates who didn't try to give me a brain aneurism yesterday
getting to see my family for a few days
Friends who are without a doubt the best people in the world
Fatakada--LOVE you guys and we have tons of work to do but it is going to be so much fun
Food....lots and lots of it....
Finally getting back in the gym now that this business plan is over :)

Just my thoughts
Radhi

Things fall into place

So this is going to be a pretty short one. Hell week has set in. We are T minus 7 days to business plans being due. And thankfully my team started pretty early so nobody is really stressing out or anything...we are just chugging along in our hole in allston (also known as James' place at 49 Gardner) gettin stuff done.

Today we had our last day of class and professor Allen, who reminds us every day that what we learn are "skills to pay the bills," decided to give us a little life lesson from his alter ego, j-rock from the block. And I guess the only reason I really felt like blogging about it is because it kinda fell exactly in line with a post I put up like a week ago...funny how things fall into place. Basically, the part about what he had to say that hit home the most was "if you are standing still, the current is taking you backwards." The world will continue around you and if you are standing still, if you don't go after your passions, you are falling behind. As simple as that.

Radhi

And then there were two

Well this is a new problem...
I've always thought honesty was the best policy
So how does one
How does one say, "hey, to avoid being disrespectful and potentially hurtful in the future, I just wanna let you know..."
How does one even start that awkwardfest conversation?
Especially when one doesn't really know if it even matters...
I just always thought honesty was the best policy
What is expected, the norm, for these things?
uff.

Radhi

patience, iago...

We hear it all the time: "patience is a virtue," "good things come to those who wait," etcetera, etcetera. Just one tiny little problem. I don't like to wait and I don't have a hell of a lot of patience. So what? Does that mean that people like me who tend to jump the gun will never get the good things in life? Disagree. I feel like those who are constantly moving forward-constantly evolving are those who will take it upon themselves to grab ahold of every opportunity. If you don't allow yourself to stop in motion then things can't pass you by because you are moving with them. We adapt. Quickly. On to the next one. On to the next class, the next task, the next practice, the next whatever. You don't dwell on the last one beyond assessing what went wrong and what you could do better. You get nothing out of dwelling. People who get themselves into a situation and then wait to see what will happen often find themselves waiting too long...and then they are the last ones left. Patience may be a virtue, but if you don't want to get left behind you had better be a little more impatient that the guy standing next to you. Things move faster today than they ever have before. And yah, it is a shame. But then again, it would be a bigger shame to try to force the world to slow down and end up missing everything worth experiencing. Roll with it. Go after things that seem interesting and if something isn't quite what you thought it was let it go and go after something else. I am by no means saying be fickle. Rather, simply because you are waiting on one thing doesn't mean you have to stand there in pause waiting for it. While you wait, see if there isn't something better. Always be looking for improvement. There is a whole scary, fast paced world out there waiting to see if anyone can keep up with it. How fast are you moving?

Just my thoughts
Radhi

Risk and Reward: taking stock of life

In the world of capital assets, risk is uncertainty. One holding a risky asset is compensated by the possibility of a higher future return. This is known as the risk-return tradeoff. Those who are more risk averse tend to play it safe. In doing so, they often times forego the opportunity to earn a higher return. Those less risk averse will invest in a risky asset-possibly losing a great deal but also taking advantage of the opportunity to gain a great deal. Uncertainty.

Life is uncertainty. Risk is uncertainty. Life is risk. I guess you can evaluate life in the same manner as you could any asset: look at the uncertainties, assess them, figure out which you can deal with and which you would rather avoid, and then deal with the consequences of your decisions. So then the question is how much risk are you willing to deal with? How much uncertainty can you handle in your future? Are you willing to sacrifice certainty for the possibility of a more exhilarating and rewarding experience? Or are you content with a more quaint lifestyle in which all is known, change is minimal, and surprises are few and far between? While both have pros and cons and people do choose both extremes and some things between on the spectrum, I myself can't make a sound argument for the latter of the two extremes. To me that is not being risk averse, but rather life averse. What chance for growth and improvement is there if you never try to see what would happen if (insert new action/decision/person/experience here)? How would you know that that end result or experience or relationship wouldn't end up being one of the best things that ever happened to you?

Fine. Some people say that the reward may be all good and dandy, but what if you get hurt? Now I'm not saying go do something illegal because it sounds fun. By all means, keep your morals and values about you, but don't not do something because you fear that pain or embarrassment or failure would be the consequence. So what? So what if you fail? Someone is going to point at you and laugh and say "you failed, hahaha?" Screw em. More often than not those are the people who play it safe fearing someone will point the finger and laugh at them. They will never know what it is to truly succeed at something new and adventurous because they are too scared of themselves to even try. Failure is an opportunity to pick yourself up again and do better. There is a learning curve in all endeavors. You know what not to do next time. So I guess the point of this post, though extremely cliché, is that we all live a little. For ourselves and for the hope that there is something more rewarding out there and that we can find it as long as we never stop trying.

Just my thoughts
Radhi

Look into the crystal ball...

So very recently (specifically since London and CORE) I have had a hard time deciding what it is I want to do with my life-what I want to concentrate in, what I want to minor in, and what I may want to do once I leave BU. Buttttt, I did have a kind of ideal plan. And thanks to the help of some very handy advisors down at the undergrad program office, it seems the plan is ACTUALLY POSSIBLE. SAY WHAT? yah. So I went into my advisor and told her basically this: I want to finish my IM concentration, do a finance and operations management concentration, and get an econ minor in the last 3 semesters I have here. I also needed to declare my Spanish minor which I was supposed to do about a year ago but now it has been so long that the entire system had changed and so I was able to just do it online in the office. So I sat down with the advisor and 20 minutes later I walked out of there with a sheet of paper in my hand that detailed every class I would have to take for the rest of my time here at Boston University to make my "ideal plan" possible. Guess what? It is a full 12 classes. No overloading necessary. No needing special permission. No nothing. The people they have working in that office are geniuses. It is actually pretty awesome how they work with you.

A lot of people complain about how the bureaucracy of universities and how they are only out to get your buck-that the institution of education no longer exists for the student. I can see where these people are coming from. I can see that the price of an education is ridiculous and that universities tend to add on a lot of "extras" at seemingly crazy prices. But I can also appreciate the faculty members who do make it their life's work to make sure that the students to receive the education they pay for, and the advisors that work their utmost to make sure that students are made aware of and take advantage of every opportunity and resource available to them. I think a lot of students complain about the prices they are paying for their education don't then go and take advantage of all of the things they are paying for. If you are paying for a career center in your tuition, GO TO IT. Go to information sessions for firms and go to career counseling. Have a counselor look over your resume. If you are paying for gym access, GO TO THE GYM. If you are paying for advisors, TAKE ADVANTAGE. They know which classes you should be taking, it is their job, and they are thrilled to help you out. Ok that is it with the lecture. I think this is part of my living every day with energy and appreciation for it. So far it has proved rewarding.

Just my thoughts
Radhi

I wanna rock right now

I had a great weekend. And it was funny because it was completely removed from all things BU. Do you ever think that sometimes you get so wrapped up in what you are doing and where you are that you forget the world around you is going on without you? That everything continues? That the CORE project you are working on is not the most important thing in the world? Guilty. I feel like this semester I've been so wrapped up in what is going on with my academics and the stuff immediately around me at BU that I haven't even really thought about the world outside. But, like I said, this weekend I got a chance to get away. I went to Connecticut and the Rhode Island because my Uncle got married. My parents flew to Boston on Thursday, picked me up, and we drove to Connecticut together. Now, for those of you who are unfamiliar with Indian weddings, they are long. They are long and tons of fun because brown people will basically take advantage of any chance to party. Because we love dressing up, playing loud music, and being obnoxious in general. Because we can.

The thing that was the most fun about this wedding (apart from all the partying and the fact that my dad's family is so wonky that I have uncles my age so I got to do lots of going out for my 21st birthday) was that I got to see my dad's entire family. I never get to see them. I feel like every time the Patel clan decides it is time to gather they do it in either Houston or Savannah or somewhere else in the south while I am allllll by my lonesome. At school. In the North. Well, this time, the entire Patel clan came to the North. And it was great. I got to see my Dad's actual brother and his family, Akhil kaka (the one who lives in Boston), Akshay kaka (the one who got married) their sister avanee, and then sachin and samir kaka (both live in houston). So the funny thing about this, is that apart from my dad's brother, all of my uncles and aunts just listed are under 30, because way early on in our family someone decided to remarry twice to someone younger each time (my role model). So Thursday night after we got to the hotel and got dressed, we went to the house for dinner and then we all hung out talking and getting henna tattoos done on our hands (traditional part of Indian weddings-its how we start the party)

Friday morning I woke up, got dressed, and we went back to the house for the morning prayers that go before you move the groom's party to the Bride's "house" (in this case the Crowne Plaza where the wedding was to be held). The thing about Indian weddings when you are close to the family is that you basically don't eat even though the food is great and you basically don't sleep. But still, so much fun. So we went to the house and chilled while the ceremony was going on. I got to meet a couple of the groomsmen and paint Akshay kaka (in this weird paste stuff that is supposed to make your skin look awesome but really just makes a mess) and then eat. After that we all loaded up in our cars and headed to the Crowne Plaza in Rhode Island. Hello caravan. I slept the entire way. Which was probably the last good sleep I got all weekend....oops.

When we got to Providence, we checked in and then I...went to the gym. Haha. Big surprise. But I have to make sure I'm not getting fat if I have to squeeze into indian outfits. Let's get real. But after that I went to go shower, get dressed, and help set up for the garba. So I LOVE garba. It's my favorite part of any event, especially weddings. So I love that Akshay kaka made it a part of his wedding. I also did a dance for them because that is what close family does at Indian weddings and Akshay kaka had asked me to. Too bad I only took 3 days to prepare for it because of CORE midterms. Oh well. I think it went pretty well regardless. So garba: good. Dance: good. The other part of that night was going to Alfred's bar with Akhil Kaka and getting to meet all of the groomsmen....gooooood. Haha. It was actually just really funny because kaka tends to introduce me to his friends as his cousin, even though that is absolutely not true. But I have learned from experience that it is best not to correct him or risk his wrath. He likes to think he is still pretty young and I guess I'll let him. Hehehehehe. So I had drinks with them Friday night and it was an "official" celebration for my birthday because they insisted we take tequila shots to properly welcome me to 21....thankfully I had the presence of mind to refuse to actually take 21 of them... When we got back I fell into bed, passed out, and woke up a few hours later to shower, get dressed, and start setting up for the wedding.

So getting to an Indian wedding when you are part of the groom's side is one of the most fun things ever. Basically the whole groom's side takes an hour to walk from the hotel lobby to the tent where the wedding was and you have a bhangra drummer and music playing the entire time and you jam out and dance the whole way. Also, we spent the hour amidst all the dancing strategizing how we were going to avoid having Akshay kaka's shoes stolen. So another thing about Indian weddings: the groomsmen (and in our family the women in the party too because we have so few guys) protect the groom's shoes with their lives; the girls on the bride's side try to steal them. The point? If the bride's side gets ahold of the groom's shoes, they sell them back to the groom at the end of the wedding. Yah, we have weird traditions and culture, but what american wedding do you go to where you get to chase people around in the middle of the ceremony trying to tackle them to get a pair of shoes? So we hatched a plan. Two of Akshay kaka's groomsmen (the white ones...basically, pretend the shoe is a football and this is the superbowl...worked like a charm) took the shoes and hid them in their outfits. Halfway through the wedding they pretended they felt sick, went into the hotel, and put them into one of the rooms. The funniest part is the bridesmaids thought that Akshay had left his shoes out with everyone elses so they went and stole all of the groomsmen's shoes thinking one of them were probably Akshay kaka's. So they had all the guys' shoes and we had Akshay kaka's....The guys weren't so happy about that part but we eventually got all of their shoes back. After the wedding we had lunch and then "nap time" which was really only an hour so I went to the gym again...and the groomsmen were in there too but I got to the treadmill first :). Why no sleep? because I would have just kept sleeping through the reception if I went anywhere near my bed.

RECEPTION!!!!!!! After my run I got in the shower, got dressed (I wore my FAVORITE sari for the reception....it is very easy to put on compared to most because I didn't have to pleat it at all....for those of you who know anything about saris) and then I went to cocktail hour. My very first legal cocktail hour. Dad "bought" me a margarita (open bar) and we had a drink together....which was weird.........but fun :) After that Samir and Sachin kaka bought me drinks. Then avanee foi took a shot with me (she claims she is too old for them but she took it like a champ) and then Akhil kaka insisted on buying me a drink. Around the time the dancing started I was in a pretty good place and tried to avoid the bar all costs. But with my family....not so easy. After the reception we threw Akshay kaka an afterparty in the hotel....at which I did dumb stuff I don't care to recount. But oh well.

My opinion on dumb stuff: You do it and you get over it. I had a conversation with Shivkumar (one of my FTKD newbies) at our initiation party in which he drunkenly asked me if I had regrets. And I told him there is stuff in my life that I know I shouldn't have done and had I not done them I probably would have had an easier time/gotten in less trouble. But do I have any regrets? No. All life experiences are just that: experiences. You learn from everything and you take it all in stride. You know not to do it the next time. You are a better person because of it. You are who you are because of every small, tiny, miniscule decision you have made and experience you have had--these are the building blocks of YOU. Take out any one block and you are someone else.

Just my thoughts
Radhi

If you ain't running with me run from me motherfucker

Ok so the title of this post really has nothing to do with the actual post. It is just a line from a song that came on my Pandora station that I thought was kinda interesting. And lately I seem to have a ton of people running with me, which is kinda a great feeling. So after midterms were done on Thursday I went to practice and then commenced what was possibly the most out of control weekend of my life (barring London....but that doesn't count because it is a different country). Thursday night after practice I met up with Simoni, Arun, and my new friends Matt and NATHAN IPPPPPPP at Beacon Tavern for what I thought was going to be a couple celebratory "yay we are still alive" drinks post midterms. I walk into the bar and Govada is PLASTERED. I walk to the bar and attempt to order a couple tequila shots (brilliant me decides that in the hour and a half before the place closes it would be awesome to drink one for each of our four midterms). But Govada decides that he is drunk and loves everyone and he wants to buy all of my drinks....and there is no reasoning with a drunk Indian crazy person from Hong Kong. I then SNEAK back to the bar to order a drink but when I later go back for the other two tequila shots? Govada once again. He also picked up everyone else's tab that night (Saturday night I was forced to hide his credit card when we went out so he wouldn't really go for broke). THEN when I went to order my last drink, the bartender almost tried to cut me off, when I was VISIBLY not drunk. (ok maybe just a little, but nowhere close to needing to be cut off). In the end I convinced him to give me my drink though :) so all was right with the world. After Beacon Tavern closed at 2 (I will never understand why bars close at 2 here) we went to Govada's and smoked sheisha until I was close to passing the fuck out....and so I did.

Friday morning I woke up because my phone was going off the hook-we didn't have class so I intended on sleeping until I woke up (something I haven't experienced in a while). Then I realized it was no longer Friday morning. It was 12:40 pm and I was supposed to be at choreography for FTKD. So I lugg my sleepy butt to Roopa's to choreo. At 3 I lugged my sleepy ass back home, got into Connor's bed, and watch tv and napped and schnuggled with him. Until 7 pm. At which point I realized it would probably be a smart idea to go to the gym considering I have a wedding to go to this coming weekend and I didn't exactly visit the gym tons of times last week. So I made Connor go with me and then I went home, showered, got dressed, and went to the FTKD BONDING PARTYYYYYYYY. To prepare Riya had made jello shots and we had gotten ahold of four loco and slizzy cups. And what ensued was one of the most OOC FTKD get togethers I have ever witnessed in my years on the team. Alums from before I was even on the team showed up. I had a great conversation with Shivna, who was captain the year before my freshman year (everyone says I am the new her but there is no way. That girl is absolutely bat shit nuts). I also had a great conversation about revolutionizing our choreo with Ravi, who was also on the team before I was-and it was nice because we usually don't talk very much when we are drunk...anyways. Long story short? Night ended with lots of table dancing, lap dances, and sajan and me running around spanking everybody. Paven kept smelling my hair and body shots happened at some point....and finally we ended at Gigas. Dear Gigas. Thank god you stay open until 3 am :)

Saturday. I guess this part is where the post title kinda makes sense? I woke up (again...kinda late. You'd be surprised how much recovery sleep you need when you have been keeping yourself awake by drinking red bull/amp'd every 5 hours for 5 days....) SO I woke up and made my way to the gym. Did abs while I waited for FTKD to come join me forrrr......OUR FIRST TEAM CARDIO SESSION EVARRRRR :D I am SO proud of my babies for agreeing to do this for me, I feel like it is going to be a key part of us kicking ass and taking names this year. So I had them all on the track upstairs running with me. And it made me so happy. And then we went downstairs and had practice and as a happy little surprise, Paven, Parvo, Shivna, Nimesh, and Ravi allll came by to watch what we had so far and critique us so we can get BETTER :) It was a great practice for the girls....the boys kinda turned into chatty cathys but they paid for it later.....hehehe. So after practice I went home, napped (still feeling the effects of no sleep for a week) and then I showered and headed to Simoni's to get dressed for Shinjini's 21st!!!!!!!! I had just bought a new black dress when we went for our team dinner a few weeks ago and decided this would be a great time to pull it out. And I think it looked pretty good except it was a little obscenely short so I asked Sim to make sure to punch me in the face if I got too drunk and started being inappropriate. We went over to Shinjini's to pregame and wait for the partttyyyyyy busssssss and then pretty much danced the night away. It was her entire home crowd from Jersey and all of her friends from here. We ended up at Sanctuary, which was a BLAST because everyone was just having a good time. Minimal drama and tons of friends = goooooood night. I also met someone who I already knew but didn't realize it was him.....Sorry Kinnell. Kinnell is captain of one of my rival raas teams and I met him at a competition last year. He was at Sanctuary and I had drinks with him and his friend and talked to them but my drunkass didn't realize it was actually him (in my defense you cut off all your hair) until we spoke the next day...whoopssieeee.

Sunday I woke up for another day of practiceeeee. The team had breakfast together at 11 :) and then we all went to practice together. We got tons done and I was so happy. And then I headed to Simoni's where we basically vegged out, ate, and then allll of us skyped with my mom to pick out my outfits for this weekend's wedding! I went home and showered and then the girls took me out to dinner for a lil bit of early birthdayyyyyy. We went to bar lola (where they dance the slasa) and had tapas and white sangria (favorite meal) and then we headed home. The girls started being really shady and I thought it was because it was a sunday night and we were all tired, but every time I said let's do (insert activity), they go "ehhhhh why don't we just chill and watch a movie?" So finally I gave in. I figured everyone was a little partied out. We started watching "Ever After" and I actually fell asleep while we were watching. But these crazy girls woke me up at 11:45 talking about they suddenly had the urge to go smoke sheisha and wanted to go to Riya's to smoke. And so they dragged my ass out to Riya's and we walk into the building, up the elevator, and as we walk into the room practically everyone I know at Boston University is crammed into the room singing happy birthday to me. It was the cutest most adorable best thing EVER. And I LOVE my friends for doing that for me. There were three cakes and tons of happy smily loving people and I felt so damn lucky for having all of these people in my lifeeeeeeeee. After we ate all the cake and smoked some of us headed downstairs to An Tua Nua, where I officially used my REAL ID for the FIRST TIME EVARRRRRRRRRRR. It was awesome. Then I really did go home and pass out. Cause 21 or not, it is time for another week of CORE.

Radhi

Welcome to the 7th circle

If at this point in my life I could imagine what Dante's Seventh Circle felt like, this would be it. And yes, I'm being a drama queen because I know that the MCAT and the LSAT and the DAT and a whole bunch of other tests are a ton worse but at this point I've had enough red bulls and sleep deprivation to where I don't really care. Dear Professor Hibbard: I shook my fist at you in anger behind your back today. Why? Because I don't understand why a learning institution (and most humans interpret that as an institution designed to help students LEARN) would decide to simulate the real world in a fashion that is completely unrealistic and not at all conducive to learning. In what world would you be forced to ingest a whole half semester's worth of information in ONE WEEK for FOUR CLASSES right after a huge presentation and then regurgitate said information in two 5 hour periods spaced one day apart? Who does this help? The student? No, we forget the information a mere 2 or 3 days after we take the test. The professors? No. You have some skewed belief that those of us who do well on the midterms understand the material but really we are just good at memorizing and vomiting out information at you. Society? (as I have memorized, they tend to be the last stakeholder in all sorts of important decisions such as supply marketing strategy, implementation, and also Corporate Social Responsibility initiatives--for all you other SMG nerds out there) no. Society will shortly receive an influx into the working class of people who can memorize tons of information but actually DO nothing.

Anyways, I took a break from memorizing stuff for these exams to rant I guess about how pointless they really are. But then again. We are all just slaves to the system. We will continue to cram the information into our brains knowing that the only opportunity for actual learning is in the real world and the only means to that opportunity is to do well as a student. So the professors will pull the strings as best they know how and the puppets will dance. Just my thoughts.

Radhi

must function at design capacity!

Hey guysss! So I know it has been ages and the nerdy title can be attributed to the fact that I may or may not have been locked up in a hole of SMG for the past few hours studying my brains out. But I am in a good place right now and ready to open a can of whoopass on these exams...hopefully :) PS shawn...studying is not nerdy on a saturday night if you take breaks to do fun dumb shit and you have four ginormous midterms in one week. I'm jussayin :P. So where to begin? Barring the past week of intensive studying I have been dealing with a team intensive semester (good thing I love my team) and the pledge process has begun and thanks to my past experience with the fraternity I think I am well on my way of making this a very professional, successful pledge process. The pledges are being very receptive and respectful (they call me "pledge mistress Patel." HAHAHAHAHA). Things with the dance team are also going wonderfully :D except we haven't gotten our mix yet....which we were expecting last week....so I may be sending a strongly worded email to our DJ in the next couple of days. Or after midterms. But I'm not nearly as stressed as I thought I would be thanks to Simoni, Anika, and the few other people I seem to be practically living with of late.

Just thought of this (sidebar) Simoni and I had a rather hilarious study break thursday on our day off before BDW workshop presentations during which we thought it would be a great idea to go to the salon and pamper ourselves a little. We figured we should go ahead and get it done to be prepared for the festivities that would ensue when our midterms were over. So we (wo)man up, take a couple shots, and head in. All you ladies, I'm sure by this point you know exactly what I'm talking about. All you guys... you prolly can figure it out. Anyways, that isn't even the funny part of this all. I get into the room with the lady and she asks me if I want the normal or the "vajazzle," to which I BURST OUT laughing. Apparently they have an extra added service where if you wanna have a good laugh you can get decorated with gemstones. Because diamonds are now essential to the experience....? After that I really just couldn't stop laughing. I mean seriously. How comfortable would that be?!

Ok so back to where I was going with this before I thought about vajazzleeeee...I guess I have been a little messy with my life lately. I seem to be in so many places at once and kind of a whirl of emotions and feelings and activities. There has just been so much going on that I guess I'm not really quite sure how to process it all between the pace of my academics going so quickly this semester--not that i'm complaining (I am keeping up just fine)--and so many changes in the social atmosphere here and the people i'm hanging out with and the new acquaintances I'm making. I'm going to, however, have to take this week to turn into a robot and function at design capacity. At 10 PM on Thursday night I will resume my human functions when I walk out of the midterm with a bottle of tequila. And yes. I am taking the tequila TO my midterm so I can commence the drinking immediately after. And yesterday a pact was made between Ashwin, Vishal, Simoni, and me, in which the two boys will be waiting outside the building with lime and salt at 10 PM and begin the festivities with us. This is going to be an epic weekend. Thursday night will be the annual CORE post midterm drunkfest. This will be followed by datenight and the annual FTKD welcome to the team newbies drunkfest on Friday. This will be followed by PARTYBUS time on saturday with stops at all my favorite clubs in Boston for Shinjini's 21st birthday. Followed by MY 21ST BIRTHDAY FESTIVITIES commencing Sunday night at either Btav or An Tua Nua....haven't decided yet...and then leading where the night takes us. Like I said. All I have to do is be a robot between now and Thursday night and then I have all the fun I could ever hope for waiting for me.

As for life? good. busy. I dunno how people do it in the real world. Hemal and I were having a conversation last night about this-it is amazing that more people do not go into a depression when they graduate from college and leave the student setting. My life revolves around sutdying, yes, but I am constantly surrounded by friends. There is not an hour of the day I have to be alone if I do not want to be. I can always walk across the street to Simoni and Ankias, Riyas, the guys, or any other number of my friends places and hang out. And the door is always open. What happens when I have to leave them all and go out into the real world where I really am all alone? Who will I find to handle all of my absurdity and dumb noises and sillyness? Hahahaha. Hopefully there will always be someone there to be silly with :) Things tend to work out like that.

Radhi

work all day play all night

HIIIIIIII guys. Its been a crazy couple of weeks. I know I haven't posted in a while...though i've been seeing most of you anyways (this weekend was a blast guys). We had tryouts today. They were amazing. I'm absolutely exhausted and we have callbacks tomorrow and maybe the day after. So i'm going to bed. I'll post for real soon :)

Radhi

Overkill

So I know I already posted today but I'm kinda anxious/jittery/dunno. So you will have to bear with me my friends. So I had my first of two interviews today. And I don't wanna talk about it too much cause I don't wanna jinx it and I was only sitting on one side of the table so I have no idea what Mrs. Patricia Collins was thinking the entire time. But it seems like a job I'd love to do. It also makes me wonder with this semester if its something I even have time for. Between raas captain, AKPsi pledge master, and CORE, and the meetings involved with these three, I barely have time to breathe and get my work done and find a few hours to sleep in the night. To work in the job, even though it would be part time, would mean giving up the gym. Now I know that some of you are like. Ok Radhi, its CORE. Give up the gym for one semester and go back to it next semester. And to you I say you guys KNOW me. You know that the gym is where I gain whatever semblance of sanity I have. If I go a week without it I start bugging you guys. Imagine what would happen if I went an entire semester without it. I would lose my mind. It is kinda my happy place...sad. I know. But even more I am now FOUR pounds from target weight. And I don't want to ruin that either by quitting now. But I know that in the end the job would be more important. So I would find some way to do it all and once again, sacrifice some more sleep (don't worry, I know how unhealthy this sounds). So basically this is what has been brewing in my head for the past couple of hours as I worked out at the gym (Ironic, I know) but I don't want to jump any guns here so I am just going to wait it out. I have another interview thursday and then I guess I will eventually have to make some decisions. At which point I will really be driving you guys nuts. It is funny because with all the stuff I have put on my plate in the past I have never felt stretched too thin. But now all of this stuff seems like a daunting obstacle. But I think a lot of it is just the hype that I have heard about CORE. Maybe I'm letting people get to me. Maybe I should stop taking their word for it and feel it out myself. Ok. ready, set, open mind.

Radhi

mine doesn't match yours

I'm officially more confuzzled. Not that this is a new state of being for me, but moreso than usual. Ironically, I understand my confusion - what brought it on and why it is here. So I guess I'm more frustrated than I am confused. But nonetheless. I am in some state of confrustrated. I think people should communicate more. WIth their friends, with their peers, with their bosses or professors. If the exact expectations of any situation are explicitly communicated at the beginning of a task then there is no need for confusion. Yours matches theirs. It is when we forget to express these expectations or simply assume some of our own that we run into problems. A disconnect. So I guess that is where I am now. Disconnected.

Sorry I fail to meet expectations. One can only try harder next time. Pass go, collect $200, and start the next round.

Radhi

Back to the grind

So I'm back in Boston. And I love it (except for this ridiculous heat that will hopefully pass now that earl has blown through). It has been pretty much your standard getting to see friends and hanging out running rampant on the streets. I don't have any classes before noon, so my nights are a little more free this semester. My classes are great and my CORE team is amazing. And Hemal said that I have the dream team of CORE professors, so it looks like everything is falling into line for me kicking this semester's butt like I intend to.
It's just so funny because I feel like when I come home I get a chance to settle into the groove of things but when I come back to Boston I practically hit the ground running. I haven't had a chance to sit and think for 2 seconds before having to rush off to meet this person or do this or go to that class or go to that meeting. It's saturday. And I already have a meeting with my pledge panel, my dance team co captain, and then lunch with a girl who wants to try out and contacted me. But hey. It IS labor day weekend in Boston. School just started, so not so much work. And labor day weekend here usually means I can expect to make some greaaaaat decisions. :) SUPAAAAA excited. Ok like I said. No more than two seconds to string my thoughts together. Gotta run. Meeting time.

Radhi

Ready or not, here I come :)

So I'm all packed and ready to go finally and as this last night before my flight back to beantown settles down I know that I will suffer a fun little bout of insomnia (as I always do). Which is why I'm happy that I will be leaving my house bright and early at 5:30 am to catch the shuttle to Atlanta at 6 to fly to Boston at 10 to get there at 12:40. It's going to be a long morning. But it always is. But what do I have to look forward to when I get there? My loves Sagar, Vishaal and Gauri helping me unpack (thank you guys so much), getting to see my girlies again, dinner with vish :) and then a nice little thirsty thursday out to kick off the semester...hehe I don't have classes before 12. I wish I had gone up a few days earlier but at the same time I'm happy I didn't. Because then I would have missed out on the craziness that was the last weekend with my sister and Ravi and Jess and Scott and Sheeka Ben and Alex (Thanks guys so much for all your help and a lovely dinner :) ). So all there is left to do is to relax for the next few hours, maybe catch a movie or something, and wait till its time to start getting dressed to GOOOOOOO :D

But seeing as I'm bored I guess I'll blog a little more for shits and giggles. And cause I actually do have something to say. About opportunity. It's a funny little thing. I guess because I never really think about opportunity. I'm much more of an "I went after it so it isn't an opportunity, it was earned" type person. But lately I have to say a couple opportunities have quite literally fallen into my lap and I have a couple people to thank, whether they end up panning out or not. It's funny because I never really mentioned to anyone that I would be looking for a job or an internship this coming semester because I didn't really know if I would be. I am about to go into the hardest semester of my undergrad career and taking that with the captainship of my dance team and being pledge master of my fraternity, I just didn't think I would want to take on anymore (not to mention roller derby next semester, but I'll talk about that another time). But then while I was in London I got an e-mail from a professor I had a couple semesters ago asking me to interview for a job at his roundtable and research facility. The place does Organizational Behavior research, which is the psychology of management basically. It looks into what it takes for leaders to effectively motivate their team. It is a pretty interesting job in a field that interests me. So I was thrilled when he e-mailed me asking. He even offered to write my recommendation for it. I sat on it, decided to send in my resume and have an interview with them next week. I was thrilled. If it pans out or not I'm not that worried because I hadn't really been looking for a job anyways. Then I got another call today. Another opportunity which I don't think I've earned but am, nonetheless, very grateful for. I got a call from Northwestern Mutual as I was continuing on the epic task of packing my clothing (which seems to reproduce) into the little luggage I am allowed to take on a plane. Apparently one of my fraternity brothers heard about an opportunity as a Financial Representative Intern there and recommended they call me to interview for it. The lady did so and set up yet another interview with me next week. So I want to thank both Dr. Mccarthy and Tim Ramos for having that kind of confidence in me. And also to say that now that I have been given the opportunities I'm kind of terrified. It's not one of those things I've chased after so I know that I deserve it in the end. This is one of those cases where the opportunity has literally fallen into my lap. So now I have to do the best I can to make the throwers proud. We'll see how it goes though I guess...I need to get some new business clothes for this.

Radhi

Another one bites the dust

Well. It has been quite the weekend. Thursday night I met up with some friends here in Chattanooga to celebrate a friend's birthday. We went for drinks at buffalo wild wings and then Hair of the Dog pub....I had a little more than I intended to drink, and then I hung out with Torre for the night. Friday morning I got stuff ready to head down to Nashville and spend a funfilled weekend with my sister. I packed up the car and headed out and got to her condo, let myself in, and made some lunch while I waited for her to come home. She had her first med school exam (and I'm sure she did amazingly) and the weekend was her "college cup." At Vanderbilt, they split the med school students into 4 colleges (yes, like harry potter and the houses at hogwarts) and the four colleges - Gabbe, Robinson, Batson, and Chappman - compete against each other in a slew of competitions from a 5k and a swim meet to an iron chef competition. Rachna thought it would be fun if I came up and did some of the events for her college, Batson. The cup started with the 5k, so I ran that in the name of Batson. Then we went back to her condo to get some food and hang out and have a few beers with some of her friends. Everyone was so nice...and kept thinking I was her (if you know us apparently we look incredibly alike...). After the little break we went to the Vandy rec center to do spirit relays. This is where things headed downhill. Rachna, carrying a friend on her back during a piggy back relay (she is really small), did something to her knee and went down like a brick. She stopped moving and was immediately surrounded by about 100 doctors/would be doctors. Ravi, Jessie, and I took her to the emergency room where we endured about 6.5 hours of different doctors telling us she had everything from twist her knee to tear her meniscus to fracture both her tibia and fibula. We were told minor fracture, depressed fracture, and all other kinds of fracture. Finally, at 2:30 am, we were told they were going to operate on her at 7:30 or risk her developing sever arthritis in her left knee later on. So operate it was. In these 6.5 hours we saw about 800 doctors (all of which seemed to be attractive males...Jess and I felt like we were in an episode of Grey's anatomy) and had a pizza party in the ER room Rachna was in :) but once we got this news we finally called my parents and let them know what was up.

Ravi and I stayed with her and he finally left at like 6:30 because he had work at 10:30 and I hung out as she went into operation. And when she came out of operation. We were given a room in the orthopedics wing of the hospital and Rachna was finally officially settled into the hospital. She stayed knocked out for a while and around 11 started waking up. She had had a nail inserted into her knee to repair the depressed fracture and cement filled the part of the bone where the drilling had taken place. She was drugged beyond belief to keep the pain from setting in. But she was lucid and people started to come visit. It is amazing how this tiny med school class of about 105 will rally around one member. People were already offering to give her rides to class when she was back in action and take notes - one of the deans even assured her that they would not let this affect her academically and they would bring materials by her house if need be. Well I had been awake for a rather longish amount of time by now taking into account Thursday and Friday nights, and around 4 I started to not feel so hot. To add to the heap of medical issues the Patel family seems to be having (my dad had rotator cuff surgery the week before). I kinda fell apart and was told to go back to the condo under the care of one of my new lovely almost not quite doctor friends. I spent Saturday night there and was taken back home on Sunday after a farewell to my sis. At least I know she is well taken care of and looked after. Mom is going to spend the next week with her as well. I'm actually happy I was there when it happened even if it wasn't the weekend I was expecting, simply because I would rather her have a family member there when something like this goes down. She is still in the hospital and will likely be discharged tomorrow (they had to keep her while they had her on iv pain meds, not other reason). She is a trooper and though she is looking at 2 to 3 months on crutches and a ton of physical therapy, I know she will surprise most people and get it done better than anyone expects.

Now I need to focus on getting myself to Boston in one piece. Wednesdayyyyyy :)

Radhi

The words of another

Sometimes someone else can put into words what you are feeling...at least to an extent...better than you can. And at those rare times you are lucky enough to come across their wisdom, you reach a certain type of enlightenment. I'm not saying that the clouds part and everything is sunshine and rainbows. Everything still may suck. But at least you understand it. You can come to terms with the sucky-ness. So I am going to use someone else's words today. Cause mine just don't seem to come out right.

"I've lived so much of my life according to the edicts of fear. It kept me from going to France (fear of losing Dan). It kept me in the marriage (fear of being alone). It kept me from saying what I thought at work or in social situations (fear of being ostracized). It kept me from upsetting the steady equilibrium of my little life. And now...
Now I knew everything was about to be upended. That was the worst sort of fear - the dread of loss..."

Douglas Kennedy State of the Union

It is a fear you can do nothing about because it is a simple statement of fact.

Radhi

Walls

We all do it. Put up walls around us so that we can manage to protect something of ourselves. Protect it from others. Protect it from ourselves. Protect it from our other thoughts. Protect our other thoughts from it. We all have this nasty little habit of making sure that we cut ourselves into neatly squared away pieces so that we can fit each piece into the certain room that it is supposed to be in. And some more than others (and I find myself very often guilty of this) make sure that I shut each door so that there is no chance of a mixup. Of emotion, of thought, of action. Its a separation of the certain parts of my life to an extent. And I don't know why I do it. I don't know why anyone does it. I don't know why I don't like talking to people. I don't know why this internal neatness has become such an inherent part of the way I function and why I can't just create a little bit of a mess. Why can't I bulldoze a wall here and maybe open a door there? Put in a window here with a light curtain so a little sunlight can come through? Occasionally a light breeze? Why can't we hire interior decorators for the little houses of walls we all have inside of us? Why can't we let someone show us the way to open up enough without giving too much away? Is there a such thing as giving too much away?

"Ruin is a gift.
"Ruin is the road to transformation"

Julia Roberts' character says this in the film adaptation of the book Eat, Pray, Love after spending nearly 4 months in Italy trying to find her "word." Trying to figure out why she feels dead on the inside. Maybe this is the key. Maybe there is no such thing as giving too much away and we need to literally take a demolition crew to the maze of walls. Knock them all down. Just let all of our thoughts and emotions flow free. But that seems dangerous. And scary.

Radhi

A world away

So I'm back home. Yah. It's been a while since I've posted. But between coming home, seeing friends and family, and then being thrown into a drug induced haze (I got my wisdom teeth taken out) I really haven't had any time to post. But I'm here. Face almost back to normal size. And back to posting :) However I can't help feeling that I left my heart and soul in a country 3000 miles away at a pink gate leading into Hyde Park. I'm sure I'll find it again though. If not here then in Boston :)

My final few days in London were basically a mad rush to get everything I hadn't already done...done. We went to the maze in Trafalgar Square - a maze made of bushes that is a smaller version of the one in Harry Potter. Minus the weird animals and spells trying to kill you. We went to Platform 9 and 3/4, I went to my gym Club Kensington one last time, said bye to Taleb, Ali, the folks at Al Arez. I had my final dinner with Shahar (as it only seemed fitting) at Stanhope Arms, where we said bye to Paul, Tony, and Dennis. Shahar and I downed almost an entire bottle of Absinthe in 3 days that Dennis had brought us back from Spain......those were some special nights. I said goodbye to a bleary eyed Julia who gave me 2 four packs of corona and sent me on my way to pack. The last day in London, Jay and I bought Cuban cigars (a long time dream of mine) and had coronas and cubans in Hyde Park as we all sat there watching the sun rise. I went for a goodbye run in Hyde Park that morning to take in for one last time the glorious nature that I had been able to explore while I was there. We need more parks here. I know this post is just a list of a bunch of things I did and it almost seems like a huge blur, but that is what those last few days were like. No downtime. Just packing everything in. My dear London friends, both in London and in the States, I love you and miss you and thank you for making these past three months of my life some of the best ever :)

Now that I'm back home...I'm recovering. Face still a little swollen but ok to hang out finally and see friends and just chill until I head back to a full semester in Beantown. Can't wait to go back but so happy to be home and so sad to not be in London. Emotionally confused. What's new? So this blog I guess goes back to being my thoughts and mundane daily actions I guess. Till next time loves :)

Radhi

Adventures of a wino, an squirrel, and their mom

<3 Paris

What a beautiful weekend! Us three ladies in the city that truly never sleeps. Bella, Jennifer, and I went to Paris this weekend and had an amazing time. We took the Eurostar train after they were done with work. We met at King's Cross station, got our passports stamped :D and then headed onto the train. Every time I get a new stamp in my passport I get a little thrill, no matter how many times I've gotten one. I'm like a little child that way. We got on the train and I started to write my paper. Leave it to us to book a weekend trip right before our final paper is due and on top of that to not bother booking a return trip until Monday morning right before work...a few hours before the paper is due. Smart life decisions.

Friday evening in a speeding train going under the English Channel. I couldn't really focus on my paper. I got through about 500 words and then decided to get up. Bella and I went to the dining car (after a little adventure down the train in the wrong direction...the way wrong direction). Bella had eaten at work, Jen and I had brought food from Marks & Spencers to eat on the train. So neither one of us were really hungry, but we went anyways. And then once we got there we decided to start our trip of the right way...the wino way :) We both got some white wine and hung out. And got a little tipsy :) We arrived in Paris around 11:30 - we lost an hour on the way there - and were picked up by Bella's family friend Eli. Eli is this amazing elderly man with a crazy mustache and a greatly generous spirit. He picked the three of us at the airport, took us to the flat, and showed us around the place. He had gotten us food stores and everything (including two bottles of white wine, to my inner wino's delight). He showed us how to set up the internet, the phone, etc. and then left us to enjoy our weekend. The flat was absolutely incredible. It is right on New York Avenue with a stunning view of the Eiffel Tower - we were literally a five minute walk from it. So what do we decide to do our first night there? At 1 AM we decide it is a brilliant idea to pack up a midnight picnic (consisting of a bottle of white wine, cheese, and bread - the true french meal) and head out to the eiffel tower. We sat there under the light (and sometimes sparkly light :) ) of the eiffel tower and ate our meal while just chatting about how our internships have been going, how things are back home for each of us, and what we wanted to do in Paris over the next couple of days. Jen wasn't drinking (being responsible and careful) and Bella was taking baby sips. And so guess who ended up accidentally drinking a little over half the bottle? Hehehehe. Oh well, it made for a very nice sleep when we got back to the flat that night.

We woke up the next morning and took our showers an pranced around in our robes for a little bit. We had breakfast, and then I ironed my dress...felt like being a bit of a fashionista while in Paris. Then we all got dressed and headed out. We decided to walk to Champs Elysees from the flat, seeing the Libtery Flame along the way, and then walk along the road to get to the Arc de Triumph. We walked, shopped, and had our first meal in a restaurant in Paris. By the way. All they eat in France is bread and cheese. I don't understand how they are not all obese. Bread, cheese, and wine. The end. Well and then of course all of the other stuff. And Crépes. OHHHHH crépes. But more on that later. At lunch I also had my first red wine in Paris. I loveeeeed it. One big glass and I'll go ahead and say I was a little happy. And it was absolutely delicious. We left lunch and headed off to the Arc. It was gorgeous and all, but beyond that it was just fun because we got to take pictures there. And we took some very fun pictures. After that we decided to head to the Louvre to see some art :) We had our first encounter with the Parisian public transportation system. Uff. Lemme tell ya, not nearly as reliable as the London one. It took forever for the bus to get there and they go so SLOW. We finally got the Louvre and of course went first to see the Mona Lisa. Which is great and all, but I feel like its popularity lies more in the mysterious history of the painting and its subject rather than for the work itself. People love a good mystery. We saw some african/oceanic/asian art as well, and greek sculpture, and some european and spanish paintings. It was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. One of the most striking pieces in the entire museum, I feel is in a stairway leading from the sculptures to the paintings. It is of an angel, somewhat ragged, standing on ruin. The angel is headless but its wings are brilliant. It is absolutely beautiful. Anywho, after we were done with the Louvre, we headed out and walked some of the way home, stopping at little street stalls to look at trinkets and postcards and the like. We finally conceded and took a cab the rest of the way home, where we all showered, got robed up, I made dinner (pasta with grilled veggies), and cracked out the bottle of vino :) After we ate we all decided to relax/nap/watch tv for a little bit. We needed to chill out before we went out.

I got on my computer, talked to my parents - I showed them the view outside our windows and they were absolutely completely excited. My dad was a bit jealous too :) And then I talked to Vishal for a while (NE). Haven't talked to him in a while but we keep our conversations pretty lighthearted so it's always pretty easy to just pick it up. We video chatted...nice to see someone from Boston. It also turns out that he has a friend who is from paris so we had a three way skype chat and we were introduced. Then he told us of some areas and interesting places we could go for nightlife :)

We finally all got dressed and headed out into the Parisian night. But once again found it impossible to find a bus taking us to where we wanted to go. And once we found the right stop it took forever for a bus to come (actually I don't think one ever did) so then we decided to just take a cab. We went to the area that Vishal's friend told us to go to and then went bar hopping :) Can I just take a moment to comment on the strength of drinks in Paris versus the strength of drinks in London? London drinks are basically water in comparison. And men are also rather...emm...forward in Paris as well. On the way from one bar to another we got propositioned. As in properly propositioned. Only we didn't wait around to hear a price offer. Whatever it was it wasn't high enough for three fine looking ladies such as ourselves :)

So Bella and Jen are both lightweights. Me...not so much. I'm not saying I'm a tank or anything, but in comparison? I was still practically sober by the time the two of them decided to call it quits. And by calling it quits I mean Bella's head was on the table and Jen was taking 40 minutes to finish her last drink. So I had a double tequila shot. Usually solves all of my problems. While I was at the bar these three guys started talking to us. They claimed they were italian so I started talking to them in Spanish because I can usually understand Italian because of the similarities. They looked obviously confused. At which point they confessed they had lied and that they were Algerian instead. I chatted with them for a little bit, but they creeped me out massively so we went and sat down. Later I got up again to find Bella a restroom and this other guy started talking to me. He was actually good looking and seemed like someone I would usually stop and talk to in a bar or club. But that was the problem. I don't speak French beyond a few choice phrases and he didn't really seem to understand much english. Ahhhh language barriers. How you ruin things for me. So after very shabbily saying hello and bye to this guy I went back to the girls. We left and went to a late night food place and got noms. Then we went back to the flat, ate, and went to bed.

The next day we woke up, showered, got dressed, and headed back out into a beautiful Parisian day. We went first to the Notre Dam cathedral, which was beautiful. Seriously. We also got in for free because it was the first Sunday of the month. Also, being a Sunday morning, we were there for mass. Which was an eerie experience. The place was huge and dimly lit and pretty friggin creepy with this huge organ playing and this guy in giving a sermon in French. We didn't stay long. I was feeling religiously claustrophobic. After the Notre Dam we decided to make our way toward Montmartre. However we got kinda sort of highly distracted on the way. First we found a fountain we decided it was ideal to play around in. The best part was this little kid wanted to play in the fountain and his mom wouldn't let him. So I immediately took off my shoes and got in. The kid wanted to kill me. I laughed. And inside? I was laughing at him a little bit. Heheheheehe. Why do parents try to make their kids lives less fun? It's just a fountain. If I can play in it why can't your kid?

Anywhoo. We then continued on our way to Montmartre but were sidetracked once again by the Pompidou modern art museum. Again, free entry :) We went around it and the art was great. I just feel like I appreciate Tate more. This museum had a ton of feminist modern art and, while I enjoy it greatly, I know there is a lot more to modern art than the feminist movement side. And Pompidou does not do a great job of showing the variety of modern art. After pompidou we sat down so Bella and Jen could grab some food. They were "peckish." Then we finally just caught a cab to Montmartre. We got up there and it was one of the most amazing views ever. The city looks gorgeous from up there. We took pictures, walked around the city (it is very parisian artsy fartsy) and then sat down on the stairs so that I could eat. A hearty meal of chips and a crépe. Oh my god that crépe. Full of sweet, rich nutella. I died. It was amazing. Then we walked back to Place de la Madeline. I navigated us the whole way using our map (YEAAAAAA GO ME. I am like Magellan). We sat at a restaurant in Place de la Madeline and while Jen and Bella ate, I drank half a bottle of Rose Wine (I don't usually drink a rose, but Bella wanted to drink with me and that is what she wanted. Oh well. It was a strong wine :) ). After that we headed back to the flat and showered and hung around. And then it was time to write my paper. Actually write it. So I set up camp in the living room and the balcony so I could stare at the Paris night sky and the Eiffel Tower - getting my last fill of Paris - while I finished off the paper. Until 4 ish am. It was great. Not really. But it wasn't miserable or anything. I slept for about an hour before I was woken by an alarm to get our Eurostar back to London. It was ridiculous. When we took it from London it was like clockwork. Like things work in an airport. When we took it from Paris, it was mass chaos. We didn't even leave until 30 minutes late at least and we were reassigned seats 2 times. And these trains are known for being on time. But it was fine because I was supposed to reach King's Cross by 8 and we got there at 8:30. And I didn't start work until 10. So I was in plenty of time. And dead tired. It was an amazing trip, but didn't do much for me in the way of resting up. Oh well. One more week. I can sleep when I'm home. Or when i'm dead. Heheheh.

Radhi

Album Launch

So I know these next couple posts have been a while coming but I was too busy enjoying paris...hehe...

On Thursday the project that my company has been working on for the majority of the time I have been here finally cam to fruition. Melpomeni launched her debut album :) I have spent time getting to know her and her music, the process she went through in writing this album, and the process she has gone through as an artist and I have to say that I have an amazing amount of respect for her. She is an incredible, gracious, and surprisingly hopeful person. Also, Wednesday while we were at the office some of the media outlets we had sent Pom's CD to early released album reviews and they were pretty amazing. So Thursday was a night for celebration.

So yah. Julia and I got to work around noon on Thursday because we were going to be working all day so we decided to start a little later. We got business done for a few hours and then at 4 we stopped. Its funny but when Julia is really excited about something she becomes like a child. It's adorable she has so much excitement and it's amazing how much she loves her job. I feel that is mostly the reason she is happy the majority of the time. God I hope I find that.

We stopped at 4, "put our faces on" and then headed out to Huxton square to Zigfrid Von Underbelly. And thus ensued a night of music and drinking. We got there in time to hear the band playing as Pom's opening act soundcheck and then went to check on her. She was in the dressing room getting her hair done. Oh that hair. It was like a massive nest on her head it was outrageous how much it had been teased. But not just teased. Hairsprayed and molded into what looked like a huge flame. It was amazing. After we saw Pom and saw that all was going well and according to schedule, we went up to the pub and had dinner and beers. I feel that if I were 15 years older Julia would have been my biggest enabler in the world. "Do you want a drink?" "oh just have one more!" Yah. Goodbye liver. Thanksverymuch for holding out for so long. We had some pub food and went back downstairs to hear Pom soundcheck. After her soundcheck we went back up to meet Julia's husband who was going to film the show and Julia sat with him while he ate and I took some food down to Pom. Performing on an empty stomach = bad. Then again performing on a full stomach = bad. Happy medium. Find the middle path. For about an hour I just sat in the dressing room with her while she was eating and putting on her makeup and we just talked. It was amazing how much she remembered about me from the brief interactions we had had and how spot on she was in her assumptions about me (usually I hate it when people make assumptions but if you're right...can't really say much can I?) We talked about all that she went through in creating this album: working on it completely alone, moving to a new country (she is australian), writing all of the songs. This album has been 10 years in the making for her. She said it was all her mixed up emotions finally coming out. Even though it is only the launch of it, she was excited for the night because she felt it was a funeral. She could finally put all of it to rest and start the next one. We talked about my interests in fine arts, my work with Peculiar Management, my studies, and she was surprisingly interested in me. We talked about the types of people we know, the types of relationships we have with them. She at one point told me she wasn't worried about me because I'm "a fiery one...there is a fire there." And while that scares a lot of people she clearly meant it as a compliment. Alas, I said goodbye to her because we had opened the doors and it was time to start drinking more and manning the merchandise while listening to some awesome music.

As the opening band went on, Maggie, Pratik, Shahar, and Bella showed up. They came to entertain me because while I was super excited about the launch, I didn't really know anyone there. But it was great because they ended up enjoying it too. The opener wasn't really our type of music (kinda death metalish) but Pom was amazing. Voice of an angel. A dark, melodic, angry angel. The set went amazingly and we sold CDs and drank to our hearts content. Julia - who my friends are now convinced is the best boss ever - would occasionally come up and as "can I buy you another? GOD this night is going well" and who have I ever been to turn down free Jack Daniels. Hahaha. And the icing on the cake was that she gave me the next day off (although I'm pretty sure it was because she knew there was no way she was going to make it into work Friday morning after this).

Look for some stuff from Melpomeni. It's kinda dark, but she has been in some dark places. But the music is great. And look out for her. I see big things for her :)

Radhi

Paris should be coming shortly if I can focus long enough to write it

My insides are wild

I scream like a child
My insides went wild

Ever feel like you have this energy inside you and you can't really do anything about it? You can't control it so you can't harness it into anything useful. You can't do anything to expend it no matter how hard you try. It is just there with you in everything you do making you feel a bit jittery - a bit on edge a bit shaky a bit as if you had taken something you shouldn't have. Some people say I'm anxious, but that doesn't quite describe it. And what do I have to be anxious about? I am definitely sad. Sad that my time here in London is coming to an end. But I am also excited. Excited that I get to go home and see all of my friends and my family (even if I wish that were the vacation and I could come back to London and stay here forever). And I'm excited to go back to Boston in a little over a month and see all the people I love there too. Everything is good. But I am going out of my mind with this weird energy that I can't make go away. It's a good thing I have my friends to keep me sane....or take me out so I don't really think about it :)

Monday. See this is how jittery I am getting. I can't even remember what I did on Monday. Or at least it is taking me a second. Oh yah. Monday. Went to work. Did my thing. Then got off work, went home, and went to the gym. Mmmmmmm gym my dear friend how I have missed you these past few days. But other things have just taken priority. Like my parents being here. Getting sick. Having a kickass weekend. But it's ok. I have returned to you. I will continue to visit you quite frequently (with the exception of my parisian weekend) so as not to look like a fatass/whale/whateveryoucallit when I get home. That would be unfortunate. After the gym I headed home, showered, skyped with mommy :) and then made some dinner. At which point I got a rather adamant text from Shahar demanding I stop wallowing in my room and go out. They were already at Stanhope and it was already around 10 and I really was not feeling a drink so I told her I would meet them at Al Arez for a nice little smoke. And I did. A nice relaxed smoke with some hoummus and some lebanese people. Awesome. Nothing like any other night I've had in London.....riiiiight. I just enjoy it so much :)

Tuesday. With this energy still buzzing inside me I headed off to work. A little late because my boss decided we didn't want to start until 11. So that was nice :) Work. Home. Gym. Dinner. And then I got dressed and went to Stanhope with everyone - drew, shahar, bella, vanessa, erin. We were all dressed in our finest for the debauchery to follow (vanessa's last night in London). We decided to go from there to Sports Cafe, where the drinks are cheap and the humans are drunk. Gotta love a tuesday night special. So we got to Sports Cafe and had planned to meet Jay and Juan there. Ali had asked me earlier what we were doing and I told him. I did not, however, expect him to actually show up :/ He is starting to slightly get on my nerves. But whatever. The rest can deal with him. I just wanted to get my drink, pong, and dance on. And we did. For hours. And it was lovely :) double shot drinks for 2.50 pounds? Goodbye liver and good sense. If there was a way to get this crazy energy out of me that would have been it. But there isn't. We stayed there until around 2 and then headed back home nicely buzzing and I would venture so far as to say content. We took the night bus back and passed out.

Wednesday was another lovely day at work - and yes, I almost fell asleep at my desk. But we have Melpomeni's event tonight so there was oh so much to do! I spent the day updating databases, doing publishing records for the Baebes' albums and dealing with press stuff for Pom's album launch for the next day. Every time we read a new review for the album it was great so we started getting really excited. Pom called the office practically ecstatic. Things are finally going well for her and I can hardly think of someone more deserving. After work I went home and went to the gym. One of the trainers made fun of me (the same one that caught me when I nearly fell off a bench doing weighted step ups...did I tell you guys about that? Oh well yah). It was funny at first - he was basically sarcastically making fun of me for lifting weights and being a little person. And lots of girls lift so I dunno what his problem was. He kept being all "Oh don't break the machine with all that power" "do a few more reps you make it look so easy" And then after about an hour of this it was no longer funny. I wanted to punch him in the face. I got on the treadmill, ran, got off, told him he was an asshole, and left. It was pretty liberating. So then I headed back to the Crofton, made dinner, showered, and got dressed. Shahar Radhika night, WAY overdue :) I love hanging out with this girl. I can tell her anything I'm thinking. I don't have to censor around her at all. I don't have to have a "politeness" or "politically correct" filter in. I can be my own opinionated, foul mouthed, some say outrageous self and she doesn't really care. She just joins in with it :) We - of course - went to Stanhope to hang out with Paul (Tony has been mia for the past couple of days...) and lo and behold WHO had returned from Spain? DENNIS! looking pale as ever, you would have thought this boy would have gotten some sun but nooooope. We drank a few pints there, chatted with our favorite bartenders, watched a rather rowdy man take off his shirt (It was a wednesday night. Geez.) He also had a tramp stamp. Yes. He. had a tramp stamp. We left Stanhope and told Paul and Dennis to meet us to smoke sheisha when they were done closing up at the sheisha place near where they live. Paul had plans but Dennis met up with us later. A nice relaxing end to a pretty good (liberating) day. But I still have that energy buzz.

Tonight is Pom's launch party. At work. So excited. And since I will be partying with her into the wee hours of the morning, Julia has given me tomorrow off work. Which means my Friday will consist of gym, pack, PARIS. That's right, Jen, Bella, and I are going to go brave the world of Paris: wine food and men. Just us three girls. This will be amazing. No question. Can't wait :) Okkkaaay. time to go finish up final details for this thing tonight and then go party like never before. Dennis brought Absinthe back from Spain and is giving me and Shahar a bottle of it....like I said. Party like never before. This might just get insane. I'll let you guys know :)

Radhi

De la Satan

This title, courtesy of Drew Millard (a.k.a. Oscar De la Satan) is the only appropriate title for this weekend.

I went to work on Friday. Tired beyond all bounds after being out the night before and cuddling/talking with Pratik and Shahar, who couldn't sleep and came to visit later that night/Friday morning. I went to work on Friday. I fell asleep on the tube but thankfully woke up in time to get off at my stop. I got to work and did my actions methodically. And then Julia told me she and Claire were leaving the office at 12:30 and not coming back till the day's end because they had a meeting in town. I was to "hold down the fort." I went out and bought lunch and sent out the post and then when I got back they left. I spent the next almost 5 hours dancing around the office to glee/whatever fun 80s music was coming on the radio station we listen to at work. Not a bad start to the weekend, eh? Just me, the sunlight streaming in through the open door, bare feet, summer dress, warm breeze, and tunes. Not bad at all I'd say. (I did get my work done first, so no calling me a slacker,k?) So after I got home from work I changed real quick and met up with Erin, Shahar, Shahar's friend Vanessa who is visiting, Jai, and Juan to go to Hyde Park at the Serpentine Bar. They have a Bus Bar that serves....wait for it....GIN AND JUICE! (laaaid back, got my mind on my money and my money on my mind). We were all super excited about sippin on some gin a juice. Then we headed out to Pizza Express (I had been craving Pizza alllll daaaaay lonngggg). I got a pizza that was one of the most rando pizzas I had ever eaten in my life. It was supposed to be a Margherita pizza (your generic basil, tomato, mozzarella) but it had a hole cut out in the middle so it looked kinda like a doughnut and then there was a salad placed inside said hole. It was weird. Delicious, but weird. After the pizza and drinks (I met up with my old boyfriend Jacky D for the first time in many weeks) we headed to Al Arez to smoke some...and drink some more. We introduced Juan and Vanessa and Erin to Ali and the rest of the crew at Al Arez. We were there for a few hours. Just chatting. It was nice and chill. We left there and Ali, who wasn't working, decided to come with us. We went to the liquor store on the way home and got some yummies (hello Jose, looks like I got to meet both of my boyfriends on the same night) and then headed back to the Crofton. At 1:30 in the morning what do we decide to do? Play Kings. For hours. Then we played Mexico. Then we were all drunk. Like really drunk. Jay knocked over the table, Juan knocked over drinks (multiple) and we finally decided it was time to go to bed. At like 6:30 AM. Yah. Like I said. We played for hours. It was a nice little throwback to apartment parties at BU...just a little bit of a different crowd (miss you guys back there!)

See the problem is that we snuck Ali into the Crofton without signing him in because by the time we got there it was already too late. So sneaking him out at this point (it was already mad light outside) would have been a dumb idea for us. So we kept him. He came and snuggled with me. Too bad SOMEONE has a hard time sleeping past 11 AM. That jerk (sweet person, but jerk nonetheless) woke me up at friggin 11:30 AM and WOULD NOT let me go back to sleep. So I finally got up, showered, and then went to go make some food while he showered. We went down and he had breakfast with the boys and then made specific plans for who was to do what for the picnic we had planned for today. We were supposed to picnic at 3 but, considering it was already like...2? by this time, That was not going to happen. So we decided to do it at 4:30 instead. We sent Ali home to gather the sheisha and stuff, and then we all prepped to go out and meet him there. I went to my room and napped (good prep, right?) and then we left the Crofton - taking Jen and Drew with us this time - and met up with Ali again. We got Mcdolands (haha just bear with me its a lot better in London than it is in the States). And then we went to Hyde Park and ate and smoked and just hung out for a few hours. We were going to take some more alcohol but, considering the events of the day - both at the park and after - it's probably a good thing we didn't. See while we were at the park there were these kids were playing football (soccer). But in Hyde Park, where there was SO MUCH FUCKING ROOM, the decided to play in the closest proximity to us they could. Regardless of the fact that nobody was playing in any of the completely free space right next to them on the other side. THEY HAD SO MUCH ROOM. The result was: I got a ball in the face. Jen got kicked in the back, Vanessa got kicked in the butt, and I almost beat the shit out of some little kids and their dad who couldn't control them. Juan's comment: "thank god we didn't' feed Radhika alcohol. That kid has no idea how close he brushed with death today." Stupid kids. Stupid father. Control that shit.

After eating our food, playing with the enormous beach ball that Shahar had, and smoking some delicious sheisha (courtesy of one of my favorite lebanese men in the world - because I know so many now - we left the park and went back to the Crofton to pregame and change clothing. What exactly were we pregaming for? Oh you just wait to hear. We got dressed in our best rager outfits and went to town on some drinks. I want to say (for the record) that I was actually fed vodka on this night. I don't drink vodka. It makes me angry and it makes me dumb. And I don't like being those things. But I drank vodka. We all make dumb decisions sometimes, right?

So after getting WELL drunk we headed out to this place in Islington called The Relentless Garage. And this, my dear friends, was the venue of the London AIR GUITAR COMPETITION. Our very own Drew Millard, aka OSCAR DE LA SATAN was entered in it and ready to show them what some american blood was capable of doing on stage armed with nothing but his very own energy and imagination and some very riled up groupies. Dressed like a complete madman, Oscar comes out and hands me his beer. He means business. He got on there and rocked the air guitar like I have never seen any man, woman, or god do before in my life.
If you ever come across Oscar de la Satan be afraid that he will melt your face off using nothing but solid air. After the air guitar competition, we hung around Relentless Guitar drinking, listening to music and just goofing off having a good time. This is around where I start to forget some stuff. I know I talked to some guys and one of them was named Chetan. He tried to convince me that our good buddy Oscar had stolen his surname from him - that he was Chetan de la Satan. Puh Lease buddy. Lets not kid ourselves here. He did, however, get really excited/not believe me that I was from Tennessee and that I love Jack Daniels. So I challenged him to buy me some and figure out himself is what I was told. But apparently right after I downed the Jack, my other boy Juan decided I had had enough and at the risk of getting myself into some real trouble (I tend to walk off with strangers when blackout drunk) so he told me we were leaving. And so we did. But not before (apparently) obtaining Subway from God knows where at 3 AM, having Drew bite a hole into the blow up guitar I had gotten at the bar, peeing in an alleyway (oops) and running down the street screaming "MY TITS ARE FROZEN" (to which Drew responded "I have a lighter would you like me to light them up for you?") I can't help it. My boobs get cold before the rest of me does. We finally got home and went to bed.

Sunday morning Jen and I woke up at 8:30 AM. The alarm we had set for 8? Never went off. We were supposed to be leaving for Brighton at 8:45. Yah. Shit. We literally both got ready in a record 6 minutes (I brushed my teeth, peed, washed face, and put on my bikini) and ran out the door to go to where the bus is supposed to pick us up - normally a 15 minute walk. We thankfully make it on the bus and, as the tour guide starts to talk to us, I promptly pass out for the two hour drive to Brighton. Jay wakes me up when we get there and we get off and go to the Pavillion. We have a guided tour of this crazy palace - the only one the royal family no longer owns in all of England because one member thought it was too small and sold it - and then head to get lunch. After that we spent our day at the pier, on the beach, took a train ride to the Marina and back, went to the Carnival that was going on, and soaked up the sun. It felt so nice to be out at a beach. We then boarded the bus back to London. I fell asleep again. I didn't get much sleep the past two days, so these bus rides were very welcome to me. When we got off the bus I came back to the Crofton and napped for another hour after which I went to Stanhope to meet up with our favorite bartenders and Shahar, Jay, and Juan. I learned how to play darts, and then watched "The Power" dominate at the game. It was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen. If I can ever learn to master the game, I want to be just like him :) After some crazy intense darts, we went back to the Crofton and I took on a game of Monopoly with Juan, Jay and Drew. And though it seemed I was going to kick some ass, I ended up crashing miserably and burning. But its ok. No love lost. I will get you boys next time ...... muahahahahaha. After that I went to bed. My back was killing me and it was going to be another Monday at work :) Although this week is going to be INSANEly amazing with Melpomeni's album launching and the launch party on Thursday and PARIS this weeked. Can't wait. There will definitely be more amazingness to come. Mmmmmm rested and rejuvenated I am ready to do these last two weeks in London the proper way. Watch out London (and Londoners too, I am giving you ample warning) if you see me walking down the street, you had best walk the other way if you even think for a second you can't handle me :)

Radhi

Oh hello liver. Why are you running away?!

I love this city. My liver, however, does not. It probably does not like me very much either. A friend of mine once told me he was going to preemptively put my name on the liver transplant list now so that by the time I needed one it would be my turn. Hopefully I don't drink my liver into oblivion because then I won't deserve a new one. Those are for sick people.

Regardless, let's just hope I don't end up on any transplant lists, shall we? But as I see it, I'm not being mean to my liver, London is (I know, this is the dumbest thing I may have ever said. It is absolutely me) and when I go back home I won't be drinking nearly enough. And I'm young. Let's face it. I won't be drinking like this forever - as my boss reminds me on the daily. Just yesterday she spent the entire workday at her desk groaning from a hangover. She went out with friends she hadn't seen in ages and got plastered the night before. But that just seems to be acceptable here. Get plastered on a Wednesday night and spend Thursday completely hungover at work. Why not. So yesterday, after work, I immediately called Shahar, went to Stanhope, and met her there. I walked in and went to the bar. I ordered my Strongbow, which came with a complimentary tequila shot, thanks to either Tony, Paul, or an anonymous person. I guess I'll never know. Shahar and Tony had a talk...as in he gave her some talking to. So I went back to the bar and chatted with Paul. They are interviewing candidates for an open bartending position there. He joked that it would have been perfect for me if I wasn't leaving in a few weeks. I'm there all the time anyways. Fair enough. I guess it's too bad I'm not staying. Anyways, I left after Shahar left for her internship tutorial. Had a little tipsy afternoon walk home (I was so busy at work that I pretty much neglected lunch and had a granola bar).

I changed into comfy clothes and had every intention of making myself some dinner. Which I did. I took it into my room, got into bed (yes I like to eat in bed, for all you neat freaks out there. Deal with it. I don't leave crumbs). And then I had a bite and fell asleep. So much for eating dinner. I actually think it is still sitting on my table right now. Well I'll deal with that when I get home. So I woke up from my impromptu nap thinking first that it was 2 am. Then thinking it was 8:30 am (in which case I was going to be late to work). Then I realized it was 8:30 PM. Dumb. It's hard to tell when it's only dark from the hours of 9 PM to 4 AM. Shahar had called me (what woke me up) and so I called her back. She and Pratik were going to be home in 15 minutes and we were going out. Not a question. A statement. Not that it really takes any more than that to convince me. So I washed up, got dressed, and met them downstairs in Pratiks room. Still kinda tipsy...or I guess just groggy. Tired. I finished off the Malibu that I had bought for this past weekend with my sister (I know. Me drinking Malibu and coke? What is wrong with the world? I hate chick drinks). Then I had a glass of Shahar's wine. Then we headed out. The Crew: Pratik, Juan, Maggie, Erin, Shahar, and me.

We decided to hit up Stanhope again. It's good on a Thursday night. We get good service cause they know me and Shahar. And I now manage free tequila shots there. What's not to love? We went, picked up a couple stragglers along the way (Jay and Drew) and started - continued - to drink. More Strongbow. More Tequila. I think I tried to ask Tony at one point why all the tequila was free. He just waved me off. Ok then. We just kept on keeping on. When they finally told us to either get out or prepare for a night of afterhours drinking (Tony has been trying to get us to stay for ages) we finally headed home. I was well drunk by this point and all I wanted to do was go to sleep. So I got in bed, took Pratik with me, and cuddled him. The thing I love about Pratik...or I guess one of the many things I love about him is that he doesn't treat me like a child when I'm drunk or like I am someone to "deal" with. He instead engages in intelligent conversations with me. Hahaha. We talked about a couple prevalent political issues regarding Europe and the part of London we are currently living in before I passed out. This was a Thursday. This is how most of my weekdays have gone. I don't know how much longer I can keep this up or if I would ever survive like this in the US. But I guess when in London, do as the Londoners do. I would feel bad, but my boss has come to work hungover many a time. I'm off to visit my favorite bartenders once again, but stories of this weekend will hopefully follow shortly. But one phrase pretty much sums it up:

De la Satan.

Radhi

and crash. fo reals this time.

So it finally happened. I got sick. London, you have finally caught up with me. I spent most of Monday and Tuesday in bed sleeping, sweating, and watching Dexter (great show, by the way). And the whole time all I was thinking was "I could be enjoying a wonderful day out in London but I'm spending it here stuck in bed." And that wasn't even really true because I would have actually been at work, not out enjoying London. So then, last night, immediately as I felt better, my dumb ass goes out. Just for dinner. Then for a drink or two. Hey, why not a little smoke. UFFFFFF. Now I am here at work. Feeling sick again. But not wanting to seem like I'm just making excuses. Gonna be a fun day to stick out. But at least I have Brighton to look forward to this weekend. And (if I don't feel like I'm going to die tonight) we are going to ali's apartment to hang out and smoke sheisha. Which should be fun. He is such a sweetheart. He sings!!!!! We sang together last night at like 1:30 am sitting outside Al Arez. It was the funniest thing ever. We were singing Backstreet Boys songs. But regardless. I know it is unhealthy, but I feel like I should just push through. I can't afford to miss anything lying in bed these last three weeks. I won't. London, look out. I'm about to hit you full force :)

Radhi

....wait what?

Dear Drunk Radhi:

Sometimes you do things that amuse me. Sometimes you do things that scare me. Sometimes you do things I really just don't understand. Wish we could be best friends...but I don't ever seem to be around when you are. So look out for yourself. Thanks for always keeping things interesting :)

What do you take me for?

When she was 22 the future looked bright
But she's nearly 30 now
and she's out every night
I see that look in her face
she's got that look in her eye
She's thinking how did I get here
and wondering why

It's sad but it's true how society says
Her life is already over
There's nothing to do
and there's nothing to say
Til the man of her dreams comes along
picks her up and puts her over his shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age

She's got an alright job
but it's not a career
Wherever she thinks about it,
it brings her to tears
Cause all she wants is a boyfriend
She gets one-night stands
She's thinking how did I get here
I'm doing all that I can

It's sad but it's true how society says
Her life is already over
There's nothing to do
and there's nothing to say
Til the man of her dreams comes along
picks her up and puts her over his shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age

It's sad but it's true how society says
Her life is already over
There's nothing to do
and there's nothing to say
Til the man of her dreams comes along
picks her up and puts her over his shoulder
It seems so unlikely in this day and age

- 22 Lily Allen

Is it possible to be an optimistic pessimist? Or maybe we should just call it realistic instead. I'm sorry but there is no way that I will spend my time waiting for prince charming to come rescue me from the big bad world. Wakeup call: Prince Charming does not exist. Fairy tales aren't real. Movies lie. Stories are great and all, and they give you that warm and fuzzy anything-is-possible feeling inside. But it is not. And you know what? I don't really care. The notion that "there is nothing to do / and there's nothing to say" until I find the man of my dreams to sweep me off my feet is absolutely absurd. A) He does not exist. B) Who says I want to be swept off my feet. I'm pretty sure that I can do a good job succeeding in this world without a man.

This isn't to say that I want to be all on my own left to conquer the world. Also impossible. No. I'm just saying that even though it is in fact true that society tends to look upon women as slightly less when they get on in years and aren't married, I think that society has it completely wrong. Who is more dedicated than a high powered, single woman with friends and family around to support her who isn't distracted by the drama of trying to find a man while she is trying to do everything else? Dear Society: Please get it through your thick skull that not all women dream of domestication and babymaking (not that that is in any way a bad thing). Stop judging and leave the women alone. We tend to be pretty intelligent so stop making us feel like we can't make it on our own on our brains alone. kthanks.

Anyways. Friends on the other hand? Completely necessary. Keep you sane. And they love you unconditionally. And that's where I meant to go with this post but then I got distracted by that song cause it came on the radio (what happens when you play the radio at work to an overanalytical, bored person like myself today). So like I said, making some great new friends while I am here in London. And I am talking the kind that I will probably keep forever. I had another just absolutely lovely evening last night that involved no alcohol, but just hanging out with friends. And it was great because it was (with the exception of Shahar) two people I haven't really gotten to spend that much time with yet. I went to work for the first time this week. Which was great. I was drugged, groggy, and felt like there was an elephant sitting on my head. I did the accounting, went to the post office worked on my credentials document, did a press release for Claire, and then started researching media contacts in the cities that the Baebes have their December Cathedral tour. After that Julia and I left the office (about an hour and a half early yay). I went home, relaxed for about an hour, and then went to the gym for a quick little trip - easing my way back into working out after not going for a week cause the family was here and then being sick. I got back, took a shower, and then went out to dinner with Jay. It was nice. I have never had one on one time to chill and just talk with him, so we got to do some of that yesterday. He is a really fun person to be around, especially when Shahar and I are badgering him to tell us his life secrets. Full disclosure and discretion please :) We ate an enormous amount of food after which I fell into a near food coma on the table while Jay proceeded to consume what I could not off my plate (apparently I am not man enough and do not deserve such meals). We waited at the restaurant for Shahar to meet us and in the meantime, ali called me.

Ali is one of the guys we hang out with quite often at Al Arez, even though he does not work there. He is really good friends with everyone who does. He also lives very close by and had invited us over to his place the night before and so I told him to call me and we would all go hang out at his place the next night...which was last night. We waited until Shahar showed up and then all went over to his apartment. Which is adorable, even though I fee like i climbed up 8987866 stairs to get there. We went in, got comfy on his couch, and smoked sheisha for hours. We started talking about his family - his life in Lebanon, his university here, what he does in general. What struck me the most was that he only just moved to London from Lebanon 3 months ago. Three months. That was less than a month before I got here. And now he is here. Living. Indefinitely. I wish I had those kind of balls. Or freedom. Or money. But yah. He is here studying right now but they guy has ambition. He wants to apply to an engineering university here and study and actually make something of himself. His brother has an engineering degree in Lebanon and they seem really close. So cute. Brotherly love. He also showed us a bunch of pictures of him and his friends at home. COMPLETE BROMANCE. It is absolutely adorable. I don't know what he does without them. It makes me sad :(
He told us stories about all the crazy stuff he got into when he was a little kid... I'm pretty sure he is a pyromaniac. A cute, nice pyromaniac. But a pyro nonetheless. He made us tea, and it seemed like time just flew by. Before i knew it we were still there and it was past 2 am. And we all had work in the morning. So we started cleaning up and headed out. We made plans to do crazy shit with him Friday night (though we aren't quite sure what that will entail quite yet) and on Saturday we are going to have an official picnic in Hyde Park. :D Ali is going to bring sheisha, Shahar and Jay will provide drinks and spirits ;) and I am going to make us FOODS. Excitement AHHHHHH. I love making new friends. Ali also has a cousin studying in Boston so he is toying with the idea of making a trip over there at some point. Jay and I promised we would take him out and show him a good time :)

Anyways, yah I guess I'm just living out these next couple of weeks as if I were a Londoner and not a tourist. I Just want to exist here in atmosphere of it all. I've already seen everything touristy I want to, especially because my family was here. So now I just want to sit back, relax, and enjoy. And I think the picnic is a great way to do that. I am also going to Brighton this weekend, and the weather is supposed to be gorgeous. So hello polka dot bikini :) And then Paris next weekend with my two loves Bella and Jen. It's going to be a great couple of weeks.

Radhi